I burn good.

It's true...I DO burn good. And, I am proud of it...well at least for the one "type" of burning that I do. (see #1) I have composed a list of the ways I burn...good. ;o)

1. I make an awesome fire. Whether it be on a beach, in a fire pit or in our wood stove. I have the amazing ability to start a great fire that creates awesome embers and therefore burning like a champion. I have always had a thing with fire...as my mother will attest. One time, I almost burned our kitchen down when I was 11 because of my love of candles. I left my special birthday candle burning on the counter under the macrame hanger. We went out to get my birthday dinner...came home a couple hours later to a stinky/burny/smokey smelling home. The candle caught the bottom fringe of the macrame hanger on fire...it made the whole thing flame up which then caused the whole thing to come crashing down from the ceiling and into the kitchen sink...phew! My parents were NOT amused to say the least. But all was okay as nothing serious happened..."just be careful with fire Pami! It's not to play with." I guess that didn't teach me too much because I also used to light a candle in my room during the night under my bed so that I could read without anyone seeing a light on. Ha ha ha! I was smart. lol Anyhow, point being, I am a fire woman...my element sign is even fire. Guess that is why I burn good! ;op
2. I constantly burn myself. Taking dishes out of the oven and hitting the burning red hot element to my forearm. (done that 3 times in the same spot!) Putting more wood in the wood stove...I manage to brush my hand or arm on the fiery hot door or latch...ouchies! I have quite a few scars from doing that. And I have only been a wood stove woman for just about 3 years. Last night, our dishwasher was on the fritz. Went through the entire cycle with no water...ugh...so frustrating. I wanted to fix the problem so started looking on the inside of the machine if something was loose or whatever. Well, at the bottom of a dishwasher you will find an element...much like the ones in our ovens. I didn't even clue in that this "element" might be hot as the cycle just finished. I pulled on it to see if IT was loose...AAAAAHHHHHH!!! Thankfully I only burned the pad of my middle finger. But it is extremely hurty I have to say. Today it is all white with a deep red circumference...it looks gross...and hurty. ;op So...my skin, which obviously is part of me burns real good. Therefore I come to the conclusion that I truly do burn good!
3. Sarcasm...it can be a real bitch and burn the heck out of some one. ;o) I do not burn people unless they have taken their opportunity to burn me. And most of the time...to be perfectly honest...I don't burn that good. But, I do have my "shining" moments when my timing and words are so perfect that it is quite a masterful burn. Then I like to yell..."Ha ha ha ha ha ha...BURN!!!!" Pretty funny...to me at least. #3 way...I burn good.

4. Sunshine...it is my friend. I love the sun, its warmth, its beauty and the light that it gives. I generally am NOT a sun burner. I seem to be blessed with tough Eastern German skin. We all have skin with good melanin that likes to show off and make us get really brown in the summers. We used to use my mom's "Hawaiian Tropic Dark Tanning Oil" while sitting by the pool and see who could get the darkest. None of us kids ever burned...just tanned very nicely. (I no longer beat my skin up this way...I actually cover up more and wear 30 spf for protection. I have become a scaredy cat of the bad effects of the sun.) But, there was this one time...not at band camp...we were on a family vacation on the Caribbean island of Montserrat. I believe it was the third day in of our 2 weeks in paradise. We hiked to this ultra private beach where me and my brother decided to get out into the water and snorkel. We were out there for like 2-3 hours. So, for the duration of our snorkeling...my back is pretty much constantly being exposed to the hot Caribbean sun. Being in the water...the probably 4 or 15 spf I was wearing had washed away and my skin was uncovered and soaking up the rays. By the time we got back to the villa my back was feeling pretty bad. I asked my mom to look at it and see if something stung me...we saw eels and rays...they freaked me out. So I was thinking something underwater must have done this to me. My mom pulled my t-shirt up and gasped. Not a good thing to hear. My entire back was covered in blisters...burn blisters. I couldn't even keep a t-shirt on after I showered. It hurt so bad. But for the next few days anytime we went to a beach...I had to stay covered up as best as I could so the blisters would heal. So sick! That is the worst sun burn I have ever seen on anyone. I burn good!

That's it...that's the story of Pam and how good a burner I really am. Impressed? ;op