Sunday, November 6, 2011

"Where does the time go"???

I've heard people exclaim, with an emotional feeling of disbelief in their voice that exact phrase throughout my entire life. I also have noticed that, I myself have come to repeat those five words quite a lot over the past few years. Days can fly by so quickly...and yet sometimes, I can't even recall what I did a few days prior because it honestly seems like so long ago. What is up with that?? Age...it's age I tell ya! I am not saying that I am aged or anything. I am aging...ever single day...I am fully aware of that fact. And time will not go by slower along with my reduced movement. It just keeps ticking away. Though, I can understand what those folks were chirping about way back then. I used to think that it was a comical saying...like someone who was bored just made it up because it sounded so absurd to say. Like as if time could go anywhere. There is always time to get things done...unless of course it is now Saturday evening suppertime and you still haven't finished your chores for the weekend...mom will surely tell me that I "ought to get it done in time to have dinner"! Time almost seemed to stand still when I was a kid. I remember summer vacations seeming like they were endless. By the time fall came back around and it was time to head back to school, I had completely forgot what it was like to sit in that desk in the flourescently lit class all day long. The last time I had to stay indoors for the majority of my wake time was months ago...and it seems like at least a whole year had gone by. Or having to go out to the mall with my mom. If I recall correctly, we generally walked around the entirety of Polo Park, stopping in most of it's many shops to browse and maybe try stuff on...well my mom would try stuff on, I would watch...this would last for about 3 hours. I would complain the whole time that I was soooooo bored and it was taking sooooooo long. Now, 3 hours is not an overly long period of time to do some serious shopping...even window shopping. (I don`t shop...I live on an island...I went through a shopoholics phase once. Retail therapy is another thing only ``seasoned`` adults can actually comprehend.) When I think back to my younger teenaged days...like ages 12-14, I could spend many hours, with my girlfriends in the mall and not even think about the fact that we had spent our whole Saturday wandering up and down the various wings of St. Vital Mall. Sometimes just following a group of boys or having them follow us around. Ha ha ha...what is that all about anyways?? Oh teenagers! :o)

3 hours of time...I enjoy going to do ceramics a la Feedlot Studios and play with clay (make my nieces and nephews personalized dinner plates)...3 hours flies by and I still feel like I need more time to create, yet I have no more time...I got stuff to do. As in ``stuff``, I mean getting to the grocery store to pick veggies and things up to make dinner with, I need to stop and get gas, I need to take Maggie for a walk, I need to get ``creating`` for the Christmas craft sale (Crafted Booty), I need to rake and clean up leaves, I need to cook something for the third freakin`potluck this month, I need, I need, I need...ugh! I don`t even have a full time job or anything...but my life can be pretty full time. At the moment, I feel socially overloaded. There has been quite a few get togethers of birthdays, Halloween, housewarmings, art openings, going away parties...that is a lot of wine and a lot of late nights. I am too old for hat. I feel the need to sleep in after being out in the evening, but I do not like to sleep in because I feel that I am losing hours of a day in doing so. At 20,when I moved back home after living on my own for a year, I would party all night at the bar or whatever and then sleep til 4 in the afternoon. My mom was out of her mind with frustration over me and the way I was living my life. But I was not in school, I worked only part time for a few months til I started another part time job, I didn`t like living back at home again...it was free room & board so I had $$ to spend on going out to eat and drink. I guess I had zero responsibility and zero respect for myself and everyone else in my family...I became a sloth...I had the time to be one. (can`t change the past...you just got to own it...understand why you were that way so it doesn`t repeat itself in your adult years.) I could sit here and imagine all of the things I could have possibly done with that time...big things I imagine, if I were the same person I am now...oh yeah...BIG things!! But, it does not really matter...I finally feel as though I am truly a happy person. My life feels right, right now. Things are good for me mentally and emotionally...even spiritually. I feel at ease in my life, where I am at in all aspects. I wouldn`t mind a better financial outlook, less debt and all...but money does not buy what I have AND own right now. I feel like I do have all of the time in the world for the things that I feel like doing. I enjoy each and every moment in time that I am given. I know that time goes a heck of a lot faster than I could have ever dreamed, and I imagine it will only seemingly get faster. Those aspects of time are what draws me to enjoy all of it. Like for real...``don`t sweat the small things```...another 5 words I heard often and now I firmly believe in. I was feeling frustrated with myself earlier for not blogging for over a week...the blog helps me get crap outta my head...I also love to write. :o) Why frustrate over something I obviously didn`t feel that I had the time for?? Just got to go with the flow of ``my`` time...keep it all on track and keep on keeping on. ;o)
Time will continue to tick until it is done...who even knows when that is or what that even means. That is for a scientist or somebody to think on. I am just here to have a good time! Peace out!

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