I have always been intrigued with the whole beginning process of life...starting with the sperm swimming it's way to it's final destination of entering the egg for fertilization. I remember the first time ever seeing that happen on TV...I think it was on the Discovery channel or maybe TLC waaaaaay back in the day. (I was still in high school, that's seems like a lifetime ago!) It was that same documentary, that they ended with the actual birth of a baby...that was over the top incredible to me. I knew how it all happened from learning about it in science class in grade 7...but to actually have the visual of it all just blew my mind. I have always enjoyed newborn babies. Going to the hospital to visit my younger cousins after they were born, then my older cousins having babies and then my friends going through it all. I just loved it. But out of all the new babies I ever got to meet...my little nieces and nephews were the most special. I remember the first time I held Samuel, (my brother's first child...first of all my 7 nieces and nephews to be born) the warmth that encompassed my soul was almost too much to bear. He was so very special...we had the same blood pumped by our hearts running through our veins. I cried with joy...tears spilling out of my eyes and dropping onto his little blue onesie. He was a part of me and I him. Looking into his big blue eyes I felt such great love and adoration...my sweet little nephew. I had always wanted children of my own...after that first glorious meeting with Samuel, the fever grew strong. ;o) But more than that...it made me feel so proud of being a woman. Just being a part of the human race that is blessed to have that ability bestowed upon me. Me, with my ovaries, fallopian tubes and uterus which would grow the eggs to be fertilized and consequently be fed and nourished inside my body to create a little being that would forever change my life and others. I feel that because of this, women have the best job in the universe. And even if I don't ever have the chance to do so myself, I still feel that I am lucky to be a woman and have it all inside of me anyways. I am woman...hear me roar! ;o)
ROAR!! That brings me to exactly where I was last Saturday...roaring and all the above. I was there, witnessing and documenting the miracle of birth. What a humbling and beautiful moment in time that was. Little baby Star was born on December 1, 2012 at 8:55 pm. He is gorgeous in every little way. I really had no idea what to expect when I came home from dog walking to a message from Tim saying that Lisa was in labour and that they were in Nanaimo at the Mid-Wifery house...and could I still be there to take photos. Ummm, yeah, of course I am still into it! ;o) Little fella decided to come out 2 weeks early...so Saggitarrian of him! ;o) I quickly made up an overnight bag, kissed Clint, Maggie, Larry and Wensday good-bye and headed for the ferry. By the time I got to the home, they were just leaving to go to the hospital. Lisa had Group Strep B (some kind of something that pregnant women can get that they have to be wary of.) and after 18 hours since her water broke, she had to be put on anti-biotics to keep the baby safe from getting it. For Lisa, this is not how she imagined her birth would go...but are birth stories ever the way we expect? Once they were settled into a hospital room, we got a call from the Doula letting us know we could come. (we being; Lisa's mother, Laura, her best friend and me, friend and photographer for the day.) When we arrived things were moving along...the oxytocin drip was helping her contractions speed up and remain constant so that actual active labour could happen. From being on the bouncy birth ball to the tub and then onto the bed with Tim always at her side, so quiet and so focused on being there for Lisa...I documented all the precious moments. I have never witnessed such love and admiration and full on "I am here for you babe" from a man to his woman. Through all of her contractions and breathing it out, he was there every step of the way. Looking into her eyes, sending his warm love and strength into her very soul...that is a true testament of unabiding love...it was beautiful to me. It finally came down to the time where the pushing starts...2 1/2 hours after we all arrived. This is where the term "I am woman, hear me roar" must have come from. The low, primal roaring that came out of Lisa's mouth was fascinating. I have never, in my entire life, heard a noise like that coming out of any human being...it just made the whole moment in time seem so real, so natural and just so overwhelmingly human...more human than I have ever sensed before. The moment you could actually see the tip of the head almost made me drop to my knees. I felt the urge to weep, the tears started to well up and my throat choke...I used every bit of strength in me to hold it back. I needed to stay focused so that I could have it all on film (or memory card, I would have to say...just doesn't sound as cool) for Lisa and Tim and little baby Star to look back upon and remember those precious moments. Tim then came down to where baby was coming through to the other side...Laura took over at the helm...holding Lisa's hands and being her strength. When Star's head came fully out, my heart literally felt like sunshine...the purity, the warmth, the beauty and the preciousness was almost too much to bear. Seconds later out he came and his daddy grabbed him to lay him on top of Lisa's chest. "Oh my god, Oh my god...I love you, I love you, I love you" were the words that came out of Lisa's mouth. I can't even explain how ultimate that moment was. Breathtaking, beautiful, magnificent, precious, amazing...I just don't think there is a single word to describe it. It changed my life forever. I was so high. I was high for days after...high on life. I just feel so incredibly blessed that I was invited to such an intimate occasion. That Lisa and Tim trusted and loved me enough to request that I be the one to help them keep those memories alive. 20 minutes after Star was born we toasted with a bottle of Proseca...welcome to the world Star!
The drive back to catch the 10:25 ferry home was when my emotions came a flowing. One of my fears of being there was that I would feel jealous. I know that sounds silly and super selfish of me...but it has been years of trying for Clint and I that when I hear someone is pregnant I have such mixed emotions. I am so super happy for them, happy that a new life has been made...but also sad for Clint and I that we might never get to experience that joy. Oh ego...you are so mean! ;o) But, when I shed tears in my quiet van...they were tears of joy and peace. I thanked God for the miracle of life and that I got to witness it first hand. I felt blessed beyond belief. I got home and called my mom...it was 1:00 am her time...she was actually still awake! We spoke for a while and it just felt so wonderful. It made me appreciate my mom even more than that very morning. My mom went through the roaring just to bring me into this world...thanks mom...I love you so very much. <3 :o=":o" am="am" b="b" for="for" giving="giving" life...i="life...i" little="little" me="me" miracles.="miracles." of="of" one="one" thank="thank" you="you" your="your">3>
Oh man...my keyboard is a little wet now! hee hee. I am such a cry baby. ;o)
All right...today is December 9th...three days til 12/12/12! I just learned something even more exciting about that day. There will not be another repetitive date in my lifetime...not until January 1, 2101! 01/01/01. So, like that is way super cool to me. Here's a shout out to others born on December 12...Frank Sinatra (RIP), Bob Barker, Jennifer Connelly, Dionne Warwick, Connie Francis, Mayim Bialik (Blossom!), Sheila E, Edvard Munch and even Colonel Sanders (KFC...also RIP). I am a little jealous of any child who turns 12 this year...that would be THE best birthday ever!!! :o) Anyhow, below is another little video montage installment of my daily 12:12 since November 19.